The Mis-statement of the Union

It’s coming.  There is nothing you or I can do to stop it.

In a little over a week, the annual State of the Union address will be made, interrupting television and radio programs that are infinitely more interesting, and we, the American people, will never get that hour and a half back.

The “president” will stride purposefully down the aisle toward the podium as “Hail to the Chief” blares, smirking as he does so, and then will spend the next hour or longer giving a stump speech that would be more at home during a presidential campaign, rather than being given to a roomful of congresspersons.  Of course the whole thing is for show.  He’s not really addressing congress.  He’s talking to you and me – the little people.

And because he is talking to us, I have no doubts whatsoever that almost every word he utters will have been carefully designed to lull us into a semi-comatose state so he can sneak in his latest hare-brained scheme.  Remember the speech that contained The Sixteen Words?  What about the one where he first talked about his plan to start private social security accounts?  Well, this year’s idea sounds to be just as fruitless and stupid as the previous ones.

Sunday, during his weekly radio address, Dubya explained his plan to help lower medical costs: private accounts for insurance costs!  Now, I fully agree that medical expenses are ridiculously high.  It has come to a point where, if I had just been shot, I would have to consider just putting a bunch of adhesive bandages over the wound rather than going to a hospital for treatment because I just don’t make enough money to pay a medical bill that large.  However, in the few jobs I’ve been able to find that provide medical insurance, it was nice to know that I wouldn’t have to stock up on that many bandages.  If Dubya has his way, employers will no longer be responsible for offering insurance (although many no longer do anyway).  Instead, money will be taken from your paycheck to go into these private accounts – sorta like the social security accounts he was pushing for so long before finally giving up on them – that will pay for your insurance.  So, basically, it’s all being dropped on your head.

Why do I think this is a bad idea?  Let’s make a few assumptions in order for me to make my point.

First, supposing someone like myself is stuck in a dead-end job with a minimal wage (say, about $11.00 per hour), and has not received a raise in over three years.  As regular inflation continues, raising prices of everything from the food you eat to the gas you heat your home and run your car with, you find you are getting less and less for your money.  You can cut back some, but only so much without moving into a refrigerator box.  Unfortunately, this doesn’t help much.  Keeping a roof over your head, keeping food in your house, and occasionally getting some clothes to cover yourself with gets more expensive every year.  But your paycheck doesn’t get any bigger.

And now, going with this scenario – and it’s a legitimate one, as I have been experiencing this exact situation for the past three years, along with child support payments – supposing some politician comes to you and says, “Well now, your employer is not going to have to pay for your insurance anymore.  Instead, we’re going to take a percentage of your paycheck every week even before you see it to pay for it!”  This amounts to taking a pay cut while the prices of basic necessities continue to rise.  And since you haven’t had a raise in three years, what on earth would make you think you’re going to get one this year?

Gas prices will continue to rise, the cost of living will continue to increase, but your paycheck just got smaller, and it doesn’t look to be getting any bigger any time soon.  But that’s okay now, because when you get pneumonia while sleeping in your refrigerator box, you’ll be able to get that medical treatment.  At least until the hospital turns you out because they need the bed for someone who is even sicker than you are.

When is Dubya going to learn that giving tax cuts to his rich buddies and sponsoring corporate welfare is not going to work?  Trickle down didn’t work for Reagan in the 80’s, and it’s not going to work for Dubya now.

Of course, another item that is bound to be discussed is the “progress” in Iraq.  To this, I ask “What progress?”  Should I be excited that schools are being rebuilt and reopened?  Why?  We blew them up in the first place.  Should I be excited about the elections that took place there?  Of course I should, but it’s hard for me to get excited for them when we can’t even run a legitimate election in this country.  Oh, I’m sure there will be plenty of naysayers out there who will insist that Gore lost in 2000 – actually, he got the popular vote by more than 500,000 votes; it was the Supreme Court that chose Dubya – and Kerry lost in 2004 (Google Diebold+Ohio+Election+Fraud and see what you find – about 235,000 pages), but when you do a little bit of research, even the most staunch disbeliever has to be left wondering.  On top of this, there are also allegations of voter fraud in the Iraqi elections, so I guess they really are getting a taste of Western Democracy.

You want to talk about real democracy?  South Africa just elected its first female president.  Congratulations, America.  We have just been out-democracized by a Third World country.

For those of you old enough to drink, here’s a little game to play: Each time Dubya brings up 9/11, drink a shot.  If he uses it while talking about Iraq, do two shots.  If he says that Iraq and al-Qaeda were working together, you have to chug the whole bottle.  I intend to be completely blotto by the end of his speech.

One extra drinking game rule: If he mentions the 2200 soldiers that have died because of his war, or the 300,000 (a low estimate, in my opinion) Iraqi civilians who have died, you must immediately pour your bottle out into the kitchen sink because no amount of alcohol is going to make those numbers disappear or make them any easier to take in.  Over a quarter of a million human beings wiped out.  And for what?  Oil?  Revenge?  I’m not saying Saddam wasn’t a bad man – gassing your own people is a pretty evil thing to do.  But weren’t we supposed to be looking for Osama?  What happened there, Georgie?

"I want justice.  And there's an old poster out West…I recall, that said, 'Wanted, Dead or Alive.'” – George W. Bush, September 17th, 2001

“I don't know where he is.  You know, I just don't spend that much time on him, Kelly, to be honest with you.” – George W. Bush, March 13th, 2002

Oh…right…

There will also be comments about his authorization of illegal wiretapping of US citizens.  As is normally the case, he will attempt to spin it to make it look like the Democrats are aiding the terrorists (or “terrists”, as he calls them) by suggesting that the NSA can’t listen to calls between people in the US and al-Qaeda.  This, of course, is complete and utter garbage.

The thing that Democrats – and several Republicans, including Senator Arlen Specter (R-PA), who is planning hearings on these matters, and Senator John McCain (R-AZ) – have a problem with is that Dubya didn’t follow the 1978 law that required him to go before the FISA court and request a warrant, which could be done up to 72 hours after the wiretap happened.  The problem was that the court was refusing him too many times.  So he decided that he didn’t have to justify himself to those people.  Unfortunately for him, this move could come back and bite him on the ass.

One thing that I believe will only be lightly touched upon, if at all, is the ongoing scandal involving Republican lobbyist Jack Abramoff.

While congressional Republicans scramble to cover their tracks, pretend to take the high ground and introduce lobbying reform, and redirect attention to Democrats (more on this shortly), the White House is in a tizzy, trying to find and presumably confiscate or buy off any photos of Abramoff with Dubya so they can continue to deny that Bush even knows Abramoff.  That worked really well with Ken Lay, the CEO of Enron, didn’t it?  Well, except for those personal notes and Christmas cards from “Kenny-boy”.  Any time you hear about the White House insisting that Dubya has no idea who someone is, you can bet on it that he knows them well.  Case in point: Time Magazine has just announced that there are, in fact, five photos of Abramoff with Dubya, as well as three other pictures of Dubya with Ambramoff’s sons.  Whoops.  I have to wonder how press secretary Scott McClellan sleeps at night.  Probably with one eye open.

Congressional Republicans are fighting tooth and nail to drag the Democrats in Congress down with them.  They insist that Dems took almost as much from Abramoff as they did.  This is not, however, true.  Those Democrats who received donations got them from groups who were apparently clients of Abramoff.  That is the only connection.  Admittedly, it is a connection, and if those Democrats who took that money did so illegally, then they need to be punished for it, especially if it was in return for favors delivered.

Republicans, on the other hand, were lavished with gifts and money directly from Abramoff himself, including at least one private flight to Scotland to play golf at St. Andrews.  Tom DeLay, the former House Majority Leader who is currently under indictment for money laundering, was among the folks who went on that trip.  How many Democrats were on that trip, you ask?  Zero.  Zilch.  Nada.  Zip.

Abramoff admitted his guilt in bribing government officials and has offered to assist investigations, including naming names.  Originally, six Republican congressmen were said to have been outed.  Then the number moved up to twelve.  More recently, it was said that almost two dozen Republican congressmen were being named.

And how many Democrats were named (as of yet) by Abramoff?  I’ll tell you how many: None.

As I said, if any congressman (or congresswoman) did anything illegal, then they need to be punished.  Not only should they be required to give back the money to the groups they got it from, they should be forced to step down.  That also goes for anyone in the White House who is connected to any of this business.  These people need to be held accountable, regardless of their political party.

However, the constant litany of “this is a bipartisan scandal” needs to stop.  Abramoff dealt almost exclusively with Republicans himself, and they were the ones who got money directly from him.  This is a Republican scandal, through and through.

Another issue that more than likely will not be discussed is the ongoing investigation into the leak concerning Valerie Plame, the former CIA operative and wife of former ambassador Joe Wilson.

Not much has been said about the leak investigation lately, although it is still ongoing.  Word has it that Karl Rove is a bit nervous and frustrated over the lack of information coming from Special Prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald.  If Rove is indicted, he intends to resign, although I sincerely doubt he’ll ever really “quit” his job as Dubya’s number one advisor.  He’ll just be “unofficial”.

As for I. Lewis “Scooter” Libby, his trial on perjury charges should begin sometime this spring.  His legal team is currently working on a defense that Libby was not the first person to out Plame.  Clearly, his lawyers haven’t read the indictment, or they would be spending more time on trying to find an excuse as to why he lied to the Special Prosecutor and the grand jury.  That is, after all, what he was indicted for.

And there you have it.  These are my predictions for the State of the Union address.  And it’s early enough where I can either point out how many things I got right, or I can pull a Bill O’Reilly and insist that I never said any of this stuff, and there’s no transcript anywhere that you could find that would prove it.

And, to finish out my 2500-ish-word piece ripping apart the president, let me add a few more jibes toward his Kool-Aid-drinking talking head pundits:

• Ann “Man Hands” Counter is a Republi-Con whore who wouldn’t recognize a real conservative if she was dry-humping one.

• Rush Limbaugh, while not as fat as he used to be, is still a puffy, sexually frustrated drug addict.  With anal warts.  And he’s not particularly bright, either.

• Sean Hannity knows less about politics than your average South American knows about the grooming habits of the majestic Canadian moose.

• Bill Bennet is a racist scumbag who is a perfect example of what is wrong with today’s Republican Party.

• Pat Robertson…Oh, hell…  Just go here and see for yourself.

• Bill O’Reilly is so well-protected by the warm, comfy bubble of his Fox News studio that he can’t even properly defend himself against a late-night talk show host who claims to have a minimal knowledge of politics.  (Good job, Dave!)  Instead, he tries to stir up controversy with a fake news show, failing gloriously.  (Way to go, Jon!)

• Finally, I have to mention Chris Mathews.  I used to be a fan of Mathews – I especially liked Darrell Hammond’s dead-on Mathews impersonation on Saturday Night Live.  However, Chris has turned into…well…a bit of a prick.  His most recent diatribe is against Senator Hillary Clinton (D-NY) for her remarks at a primarily African-American church on Martin Luther King Day.  She said that the Republican-led congress is run like a plantation, and the Democrats are treated like the slaves – no say in anything, no choices, etc.  Apparently, this got to Mathews, and he won’t let it go.  He calls it race-baiting.  I call it pretty accurate.  He also compared Osama bin Laden’s latest audio tape to the work of Michael Moore.  I’d like to hear that explanation.

Remember: This year is a congressional election year.  Make a difference.  I don’t care who you vote for, just so long as you get out and vote.

All the best,
Derek
(DCF)